BEEP! BEEP! IT'S ME.

"Begin at the beginning,and go on till you come to the end: then stop." (Lewis Carroll, 1832-1896)

Alice came to a fork in the road. "Which road do I take?" she asked."Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat."I don't know," Alice answered."Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."

"So long as I get somewhere," Alice added as an explanation. "Oh, you're sure to do that," said the Cat, "if you only walk long enough."

"All right," said the Cat; and this time it vanished quite slowly, beginning with the end of the tail, and ending with the grin, which remained some time after the rest of it had gone. "Well! I've often seen a cat without a grin," thought Alice; "but a grin without a cat! It's the most curious thing I ever saw in my life!"

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I am diagonally parked in a parallel universe. Like Arthur Dent from "Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy", if you do not have a Babel Fish in your ear this blog will be completely unintelligible to you and will read something like this: "boggle, google, snoggle, slurp, slurp, dingleberry to the power of 10". Fortunately, those who have had the Babel Fish inserted in their ear, will understood this blog perfectly. If you are familiar with this technology, you will know that the Babel Fish lives on brainwave radiation. It excretes energy in the form of exactly the correct brainwaves needed by its host to understand what was just said; or in this case, what was read. The Babel Fish, thanks to scientific research, reverses the problem defined by its namesake in the Tower of Babel, where a deity was supposedly inspired to confuse the human race by making them unable to understand each other.

"DIFFICILE EST SATURAM NON SCRIBERE"

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Friday, April 14, 2006

A Pagan Easter Poem


A Pagan Easter Poem

The sacred day of Easter comes,
When every Christian household hums.
Baskets with eggs and bunnies too,
and kiddies get some clothes,
all new.
Just everyone is seen in church.
The preacher sits upon his perch.
Tells of your son whose blood dripped down
to save the sinners of the town.
I squirm each time I have to hear
that torture tale of death and fear.
They put your son then in a tomb,
a big one with a lot of room.
He wouldn’t stay; three days wentby,
and he was as alive as I.
I find that yarn real hard to take.
God, didn’t you make a big mistake?
If you’re powerful like they say,
couldn’t you find a better way?
All sungods seem to be connected,
Cause all were killed and resurrected.

reprinted from The Willamette Freethinker,
newsletter for the Corvallis Secular Society, 1999

Easter Sunrise Service: This custom can be traced back to the ancient Pagan custom of welcoming the sun God at the vernal equinox - when daytime is about to exceed the length of the nighttime. It was a time to "celebrate the return of life and reproduction to animal and plant life as well."

Easter Candles: These are sometimes lit in churches on the eve of Easter Sunday. Some commentators believe that these can be directly linked to the Pagan customs of lighting bonfires at this time of year to welcome the rebirth/resurrection of the sun God.

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3 Comments:

Blogger Chimera said...

The crucifixion-and-resurrection myth of Christianity is predated by at least two other ancient myths that I know of (and possibly more): the story of Odin, who hanged himself upside down from a tree for nine days in order to gain wisdom; in the process, he died and came back to life; and the story of Osiris, who was killed and dismembered by his brother, and the parts scattered around the earth -- but he managed to impregnate Isis after his death, and she subsequently gave birth to Horus.

Dying-and-rising gods are very common. What makes this one so special?

15/4/06 4:11 am  
Blogger Simon said...

Seems a pretty sensible idea - celebrating the return of spring.

15/4/06 4:37 am  
Blogger The Jolly Nihilist said...

Nice post; great poem!

This all clearly tells a little-known fact: The Christians ripped off the Pagans. They weren't even creative enough to invent their own holiday and their own traditions. They had to borrow from those that already existed.

15/4/06 3:16 pm  

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