I have provided a title so Bush Believers will also be able to understand what the rest of us are laughing about.
George Is A Mom?
"So thank you for reminding me about the importance of being a good mom and a great volunteer as well."—St. Louis, Jan. 5, 2004
What about the WMD the US Has, George?
"See, free nations are peaceful nations. Free nations don't attack each other. Free nations don't develop weapons of mass destruction."—Milwaukee, Wis., Oct. 3, 2003
Maybe He Meant "Explore"?
"We've got hundreds of sites to exploit, looking for the chemical and biological weapons that we know Saddam Hussein had prior to our entrance into Iraq."—Santa Clara, Calif., May 2, 2003
George Wants To Restore Chaos. Mission Completed
"You're free. And freedom is beautiful. And, you know, it'll take time to restore chaos and order—order out of chaos. But we will."—Washington, D.C., April 13, 2003
We Must Invade Iraq To Stop Saddam Terrorising Himself.
"The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorize himself."—Grand Rapids, Mich., Jan. 29, 2003
This Is Just Wrong On So Many Levels. How About Presumption Of Innocence And "Prosecute" Not "Persecute"
"When Iraq is liberated, you will be treated, tried, and persecuted as a war criminal."—Washington, D.C., Jan. 22, 2003
The US Is Going To Disarm If Saddam Doesn't
"I was proud the other day when both Republicans and Democrats stood with me in the Rose Garden to announce their support for a clear statement of purpose: you disarm, or we will."—Speaking about Saddam Hussein, Manchester, N.H., Oct. 5, 2002
Why George? Thinking About Pulling Out The Klan Outfit?
"Do you have blacks, too?"—To Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso, Washington, D.C., Nov. 8, 2001
George Wanted Arafat To Rule The World
"After all, a week ago, there were—Yasser Arafat was boarded up in his building in Ramallah, a building full of, evidently, German peace protestors and all kinds of people. They're now out. He's now free to show leadership, to lead the world."—Washington, D.C., May 2, 2002
George Gives Us A Hint Why His Businesses Have Gone Bankrupt
"We've tripled the amount of money—I believe it's from $50 million up to $195 million available."—Lima, Peru, March 23, 2002
George Doesn't Want Peace To Happen
"My administration has been calling upon all the leaders in the—in the Middle East to do everything they can to stop the violence, to tell the different parties involved that peace will never happen."—Crawford, Texas, Aug, 13, 2001
"Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods."—Austin, Texas, Dec. 20, 2000
Ummm It Is A Federal Program?
"They want the federal government controlling Social Security like it's some kind of federal program."—St. Charles, Mo., Nov. 2, 2000
Fish Are Violent Apparently
"I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully."—Saginaw, Mich., Sept. 29, 2000
Most Imports DO Come From Overseas
"It is clear our nation is reliant upon big foreign oil. More and more of our imports come from overseas."—Beaverton, Ore., Sep. 25, 2000
George Loves His Wife Like He Loves His Brother
"She is a fabulous First Lady. I was a lucky man when she said, yes, I agree to marry you. I love her dearly, and I'm proud of the job she's doing on behalf of all Americans. Just like I love my brother." - George W. Bush, Jacksonville, Florida, Sep. 9, 2003
The Nazis Agree With You About Propaganda
"See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda." --President Bush, Greece, N.Y., May 24, 2005
Please Shut Up Now
"Who could have possibly envisioned an erection — an election in Iraq at this point in history?" —George W. Bush, at the white House, Washington, D.C., Jan. 10, 2005
I Am Begging You. Shut Up
"I think — tide turning — see, as I remember — I was raised in the desert, but tides kind of — it's easy to see a tide turn — did I say those words?" —George W. Bush, asked if the tide was turning in Iraq, Washington, D.C., June 14, 2006
"The point now is how do we work together to achieve important goals. And one such goal is a democracy in Germany." —George W. Bush, D.C., May 5, 2006
George Wants To Control Us Not Defend Freedom
"Let me put it to you bluntly. In a changing world, we want more people to have control over your own life." —George W. Bush, Annandale, Va, Aug. 9, 2004
And My All Time Favourite
"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country." — George W. Bush, Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004
The Best Of Bushisms